Happy Lunar New Year. So they tell me. And once again, I am reminded that I have no idea how this magical date is determined. This year, the year of the Ram, it falls on February 1st. Next year, it will be January 22nd. A google search tells me this: The Chinese New Year falls on a different date each year because it is based on a combination of lunar and solar movements. It usually occurs in January or February. Yes, I did my research.

But still, I am boggled.

So, I have devised a more practical and understandable theory; I have come to the conclusion that there must be 5 old Asian wise men from the kingdoms of China, Corea, Japan, Vietnam, and Tibet who trek far and wide to meet together on December 31st upon the bidding of Mama Ali San, a wise old Taiwanese woman. Each guards carefully a glimmering six-sided dice chained around their neck. They chant "My Precious! O my Precious!" as Mama A begins the process of determining the start date of the following new year.

Mama A: "Umm. OK guys. I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 2..."
5 wise guys: "Two!" [in unison]
Mama A: "Yes! A two it is! OK now... ready to roll? Set... Go!"
5 wise guys: "My precious!!" [as dice are rolled onto the spinning Lazy Susan table top]
Mama A: "Oh ohhhh.... OH! Will ya look at that? What are the chances... Dang! Four of five dice thrown off the table..."
1 wise guy: "Mine's a winner! Precious!"
Mama A: "Yes, and we've got a low number this year... a one! So it's gonna be a two and one this year boys. February 1st."
Mama A: "Hey, how about we all roll again til 2007 so we can take a break from this epic trekking business..."

With that, the fate of all Asian people is determined.

2005: February 9 - Rooster
2006: January 29 - Dog
2007: February 18 - Pig