Thinking back to last week while hosting and hanging out with my filmmaker friend Wendy was without a doubt one of the most meaningful weeks of my life.

There's something so fulfilling about connecting with someone immediately without needing to fill the air with conversation or feeling that every minute spent should be occupied by some purposeful activity. In fact, I really quite appreciated the many times Wendy and I had nothing planned, and she would be sitting next to me lost in contemplation, analyzing deeply some aspect of her life. And finally after an extended period of silence, she would express some random thoughts or conclusions, which I would promptly say to myself, "Hey, those are my thoughts exactly" or "Wow! I feel the same way!" And I would wonder if she was some earthly angel sitting on my shoulder and whispering into my ear.

This laid-back week made me realize that all too often, our lives are simply juxtapositions of work schedules, appointments, and events assembled together to maintain the appearance of a purposeful and efficient life. Even our times spent with friends become just a gathering over a meal or a meeting at a cafe during some mutually convenient hour. What we really all should aim for is some deeper connection with each other and just appreciating some quality time gazing in the same direction.

Is it that hard to do? I don't know. But one thing is for sure, I don't have enough of it, whatever "it" is.

Maybe I am idealizing this meaningful time spent with Wendy. Maybe I just needed a break from my own hectic life and packed schedule. But what I do know is this: I will fondly remember our week together chatting during our daily drives to and from the SF International Asian American Film Festival, discussing projects, people, and ideas over fine brunches or quickie dinners, and talking about life and old age while kicking back in my living room or on the patio at 2 AM in the morning.

Perhaps this is a glimpse into what a quality friendship should be. Or what life in general should feel like.

Thanks Wendy for unconsciously making me realize this. Miss you!